We’re joined on the podcast this week by Adam MacLean (@adammacattack) who is the founder of PostShame.org and #PostShame, online tools designed to help people examine their past for things they worry might leak on the internet, and then proactively share those stories themselves. By doing so, they transform these stories into narratives of strength and leadership, offering support to others struggling with similar challenges. He is also the host of the podcast
“Find Your Light with Adam MacLean”, where he navigates difficult conversations around shame, leadership, and self-acceptance. In these discussions, Adam integrates his expertise in holding space for others, helping listeners work through challenges related to the body, mind, and spirit—particularly within the realms of sacred intimacy.
In this conversation, Brian and Adam delve into the complexities of shame, particularly within the LGBTQ community. They explore the concept of post-shame, the impact of the internet on personal narratives, and the distinction between guilt and shame. Adam shares his personal journey, including his experiences with spirituality and 12-step programs, and how these intersect with his queerness. The discussion also touches on the significance of rituals in creating meaning and community, culminating in reflections on marriage and personal transformations. In this conversation, Adam and Brian explore the complexities of shame, relationships, and the impact of online culture on personal identity. They discuss the PostShame process, which helps individuals confront their pasts and navigate the challenges of public scrutiny. The dialogue delves into the nuances of sexuality, consent, and the importance of context in conversations about intimacy. They also touch on the experiences of men in today’s society, the distinction between erotic and pornographic expressions, and the significance of gender affirmation in personal journeys.
Takeaways
- Dissolving shame is essential for self-acceptance.
- The internet amplifies the experience of shame.
- Guilt is about actions, while shame is about self.
- Community plays a crucial role in healing from shame.
- Rituals can help create meaning in our lives.
- Personal narratives can be transformed through sharing.
- Spirituality can be redefined outside traditional structures.
- Queerness and theology can coexist harmoniously.
- Self-expression is a radical act of love.
- Marriage can mark a significant shift in relationships. We can only make commitments in our relationships.
- Online shaming is not evenly distributed.
- The PostShame process helps individuals reclaim their narratives.
- Navigating shame involves understanding context and consent.
- Sexuality and shame are often intertwined in complex ways.
- The distinction between erotic and pornographic is crucial.
- Healing can involve somatic practices and intimacy.
- Men often struggle with loneliness and connection.
- Trans experiences challenge traditional notions of gender.
- Dissolving shame is a shared mission for many.
Chapters
03:05 – The Birth of Post-Shame and Personal Journey
07:11 – Understanding Guilt vs. Shame
10:09 – The Role of the Internet in Shaming
11:45 – Revisiting 12-Step Programs and Spirituality
14:55 – The Intersection of Queerness and Theology
19:19 – Rituals and Their Significance in Community
21:57 – Personal Reflections on Marriage and Rituals
31:46 – Interrogating Language and Relationships
33:14 – Moving Beyond Shame
34:28 – The PostShame Process
36:46 – The Impact of Online Shaming
38:07 – Navigating Sexuality and Shame
39:40 – Context and Consent in Conversations
42:46 – The Distinction Between Erotic and Pornographic
47:34 – Sacred Intimacy and Healing
50:27 – Male Loneliness and Connection
56:12 – Trans Experiences and Gender Affirmation
Resources:.
- Learn more about Adam at https://www.postshame.org/adammaclean
- Join our online community at Sanctuary Collective Community
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